"Go into yourself. Find out the reason that commands you to write; see whether it has spread its root into the very depths of your heart; confess to yourself whether you would have to die if you were forbidden to write." Rainier Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Life: an act of trapeze

Believe me or not but we do have this strange affliction of overlooking the good parts in our life. For us the grass had always been and would always be greener on the other side. Promises: that's what i had been oddly thinking about during my work out today and realised that God had been good to me and kept some of His promises very faithfully. Where i always used to feel as being the odd one out,today i can gel in and connect well with my family. Happy for that. :)

I am yet to start next phase of my life..marriage and all,but life's good at home with mum-dad too. Bridges have been built,no grudges,no complains and past seems unreal today,one that leaves behind a hint of having occurred a lifetime ago. God had been good to grant me this time in which i could laugh with my family,and honestly these will be the days that i would miss and cherish for all my life to come.

With the sudden realisation of promises fulfilled there arrives also the scent of trust that as long as His presence continues in my life things would get better. I might not get all that i want,but i would be provided with all that i need;that much i believe.

Life is a balancing act. I am not visibly depressed or broken down when i am sad. I still do feel sad,a void left behind by all the friends and people who had promised to stay with me through thick and thin of it...and did not. But i can contain all that and carry on without projecting any of it. Which i consider as a huge personal achievement. Likewise neither i am excessively overjoyed by turn of events in my favour.

I have learnt (and am still learning) that being calm and serene,holding your smile all the while trusting a higher force to align things for you is the best way to live a happy life. I read somewhere be like a duck,calm and composed on the outside but underneath the surface of water pedal like a devil.

A blessed night to every one and a soulful sleep.

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