"Go into yourself. Find out the reason that commands you to write; see whether it has spread its root into the very depths of your heart; confess to yourself whether you would have to die if you were forbidden to write." Rainier Maria Rilke, Letters to a Young Poet

Monday, April 2, 2012

to aziztarin doostami... (you my dearest friend)

I am a very difficult person to live with. I am lazy,laid-back,short tempered and stubborn almost to the point of being obnoxious. I have no idea as to how and why people even put up with me !  My friends are so numbered it seems as if  i am poor to the extent of affording any. Well i have just four good friends,and they are the four nicest people on this planet earth,also i think they are four of the most patient people on this planet as well. I never call,message or try to have any human contact with them whatsoever. I am busy with my own little world and a bunch of some silly stuff,and i never even bother to consider taking out time for them.

God bless their souls,they everytime claw their way back into my life. And as selfish as i am,they are still there with me in my every need...at my beck n call. They are the angels who light up my dark days and also the devils who beat me with their clubs when i need that bashing. But they keep me grounded and sane,there isn't any doubt in it. As to why am i so "anti-social" i have no idea at all ! I like to believe that i am just plain lazy :) That's probably the nicest and the least sickly of all the probable explanations.

I haven't been a good friend to any of them. For some i haven't been at the time of her need,for other i have been inconsiderate sometimes,and still other times i had been blatantly careless. To my family i owe a lot,they have stuck by me without questioning when i needed them. I can never forget how supportive my parents had been when i didn't make it through my PG entrance exams. They still are very kind to me,that actually i do not deserve :) Like the prodigal son they accepted me back without demanding any explanations or apology. But friends have been someone who had helped me come so far,and made me "acceptable" to the human race :)

Oh i talk to them for hours together and bore them with my endless jibber-jabber. Which they patiently listen to and provide me with some precious advice too. They act almost like my shrink ! Only that they aren't getting paid ! Infact they have to call me up and listen to my painlessly boring botherings at my whim and fancy :) Thank you guys for without you life wouldn't have been same for me. At times alone and mostly with you all i have safely come so far,and i believe that with you beside me i could make it as far as i am supposed to....and may be even beyond :)

Thanks and love ya :*

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